We continue with the general reasons why people sexually cheat. We have covered the first two of the seven reasons we now continue with the rest. It is my conviction that the reasons am giving are not to serve as a justification of the crime of cheating and neither should they be used as a means of vindicating the culprit. The reasons I present are for the awareness of those who honestly intend to protect themselves and their lovers from the vice. Let us now turn to the reasons:
3. PRESENCE:
Believers and churchgoers do understand the importance of being in the presence of the Lord. I have always cautioned the worship leader at our fellowship (Brother Peter Carlveland), to ensure that he ushers us in the presence of the Lord. There is nothing as important as presence even in worship. Presence is at the base of the survival and thriving of any business. Delegation doesn’t work with money, with worship and neither does it work with an intimate relationship. In a love-relationship, one must understand that it is 24/7 365 days’ practice.
Love is a product of physical and psychological presence. Without those two being truly present, love cannot happen. It doesn’t matter whether someone linked you (lovers) but after that, each of you must be present. Lovers must be physically present and that is why the idea of long-distance relationships is one of the reasons people cheat. You cannot be intimately in a relationship and distanced at the same time. Absence is a strong temptation to many. Your spouse must be involved in the details of those very affairs that might lead to a sexual breach. Not being around whenever needed makes lovers vulnerable to infidelity.
Absence is dangerous but not as dangerous as what I call ‘poor presence’. Poor Presence is when one is emotionally/psychologically present but physically absent or physically present but emotionally absent. This is poor presence and it hurts more than total absence. It is important for both parties to be truly present and to be truly present means being both physically and emotionally present.
Presence is being fully aware, and here, in the moment. Note the three words that define presence: aware, here, moment.
(a)-Aware: Being present means that you are aware of the meaning of the said, gestures and silence of your spouse. Ensure that you are aware and don’t assume you are, please be inquisitive. Ask and find out how they feel and please lovers speak out your feelings to each other and find a solution together rather than managing it yourself. Please communicate if you are the one in the problem and please listen to your communicating spouse. Not everyone has a good emotional quotient so we must communicate our emotions to our spouses before they lead us out to the vultures. Emotional awareness is presence.
(b)-Here: Presence means literally being there; we all need and would love to appreciate those individuals who are always there for us. It is for this reasons that your spouse might easily cheat with the handyman, the maid, the driver, workmate, frequent travel-mate, the doctor, gym instructor etc. just because these are always there and they are aware of your spouse’s needs. Physicality operates as a movie director in relationships when you are available; you influence every scene of the life of your spouse. Your physical presence functions as a court restraining order. Physical presence affects the identity of our spouses; physical presence is not a pattern but an art.
(c)-Moment: Here is what I mean by ‘in the moment presence’, you were not there on her birthday, not there at the funeral, you were not there at the delivery ward. You were not there at her congratulatory party, you were not there at the party/club, you were not there when she was high and horny, in each and every high and low moment you were absent. You were absent ‘in the moment’ and the most crucial moment of their lives, and unfortunately, those they are cheating with, were there in the moment.
It is absurd that some people are having sex with their spouses but with their minds fixed with another candidate as a motivation factor. If you have your spouse with you physically but without their mind then chances are high, they will follow their mind and cheat. Under this reason, we cheat because we feel abandoned, lonely and substituted. God said: “It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18)
4. HEALTH:
Physiological welfare could be the reason why spouses cheat. Some men are impatient and cannot afford or actually sometimes, they are cornered at the moment when their wives are in their menstrual cycle (Leviticus 15:19,24; 18:19; Ezekiel 22:10). Some men cheat when their wives are pregnant (Leviticus 12:2). Sometimes it is the hormonal imbalances in one of the spouses and they don’t feel like having sex for the whole month. It could be a serious ailment, an injured back, injured sexual organs (Deuteronomy 23:1) or an infection (both curable and incurable). Cheating could also happen due to good health, some men or women are sexually too strong for their spouses and cannot be satisfied by their spouses alone.
These cheat to fill the missing gap that their spouses cannot fill without external help. It would be naïve for us to castigate these individuals as sexually greedy, I would rather we appreciate they are gifted sexual dynamos. They have a health status that is not fit for everyone. Health-conditions are reasons for some cheating. Note that I mentioned earlier that none of these seven reasons justifies sexually cheating and none of these reasons vindicates the culprit.
Cheating is wrong regardless of the reasons. Health reasons can go as far as a man having low sperm-count or docile sperms that aren’t fast enough to fertilize a woman for pregnancy and a woman will cheat for pregnancy purposes. Health cheating reasons are those reasons people seek sex outside yet they can fix them with their spouses. With the health, reasons for cheating lovers have three alternatives depending on the situation they are dealing with. If the health condition is curable, spouses must focus all their energy on fixing that. If it is incurable, one spouse who is not affected yet must resolve to be suicidal and stand for better or for worse and sacrifice their life for the other or alternative three, the spouse must quit the relationship altogether instead cheating or committing suicide. Under this reason, we cheat because we are either sick or for health incompatibilities.
God bless you I invoke TRUTH, WISDOM and FAITH (2Tim 2:7)
Priest Isaiah White (+256-775 822833 for further inquiries)
iTiS Well of Worship Fellowship (John 4:24)
iTiS Well of Worship Fellowship (John 4:24) 
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