Recently, a young talented boy died. I knew this boy when he was still a child. I and his parents went to the same church. He grew up to be a talented and jolly boy. He was generally stubborn and very creative and in just a short time, he had become an influence to many of his peers, especially in church-music circles.
This boy received silent celebration while he was alive and energetic but when he got critically ill and bed ridden (in ICU), a lot of attention was drawn to him. Many fell in love with him as he gasped for breath on oxygen tubes and cylinders. Majority, in his circles, went viral on social media, praying for him and telling God how they couldn’t afford to lose such a treasure. They started fundraising drives for him. Too many shades of love were painted to the unconscious brother and this love and praise for the boy intensified when he lost the battle and passed on.
Upon his death, the celebration of and praise to him began. Everyone hang his picture on their timelines, he became the topic in various social media groups. All this was done majorly by the youth and as I watched, I realized that we the elders have passed on a poor habit to our young ones. That poor habit is the Love of the dead. Our generation has committed the sin of praising people at their point of failure and fight, criticize them in their able moments. Our world is guilty of THE GRATITUDE TO THE DEAD IN FORM OF BEAUTIFUL EULOGIES. This is what I call the eulogies of cowardice.
How we love the Dead and the Weak
We live in a world where people will notice that you are good person, you are good at what you do, you are right, talented and able and those who are kind will pretend they didn’t see it. To some, your success will only attract competition, criticism and fights. Many people really love you and because they love you they will not praise you for what you are good at.
You hear them say that if they tell you that you are good, you will become proud and fall from the good in no time. Some parents will not tell their pretty children that they are pretty but instead tell those children without good looks that they are beautiful. If you asked them, they will say, they have to encourage these with weak eyes at the expense of the beautiful.
When you are alive and healthy, you spend months wrestling with relatives and friends you bump into on streets asking them to visit you. But when you fall sick and can’t sustain a conversation they visit in plenty and start a sweet conversation. People find it difficult to even lend a helping hand in all your struggles but when you die they happily buy you the most expensive dress.
They offer to foot a bill of a funeral service company to conduct an honourable burial for you. They travel from miles by road, air and water to come and bury you. Upon your death, people will pick up microphones and pledge to sponsor the orphans throughout school (some fulfil this, others don’t). Others pledge to finish your unfinished projects like a house etc.
There are a thousand people who know you are good and they never tell you. They will never appreciate you and the only reason seem to be that you are still alive and healthy. A good spouse is appreciated after a breakup or death. How many husbands wake up one morning and throw a thanksgiving party to their lovely wives?
How many wives praise their men in the hearing of other women instead of complaining about what men have failed? Why are we so bent to failure and death than success and life? It was Anne Frank who said,
“Dead people receive more flowers than the living because regret is stronger than gratitude”.
Why is the budget of the sick and the dead bigger than the budget of the living? I will tell you why we are not just hypocrites but real cowards.
Bold Cowardice
What I call ‘Bold Cowardice’ is when people speak good of the no more yet the late never heard all these beautiful things about them. What I call bold cowardice is when people invest millions in your wedding party they are going to be part of and not a single penny in your education, house or plot of land.
Bold cowardice is when the mourners eulogise a thief who actually died in the act and talk good about him where there is literally no good. People are not bold to tell you face to face that you are wrong, but they are bold enough to tell others how bad you are. People are not bold to tell you in your hearing how good you are but are audacious enough to be the keynote speakers at your funeral.
No one wants to hang you as their profile picture or even wallpaper, no one makes a T-Shirt with your picture or signature on it while you are alive, but these very people are bold enough to wear those branded stickers and shirts with the celebrities they don’t have a personal encounter with.
I want to live in a world where marrieds intentionally narrate the good of their spouse in their hearing and before the world. Eulogies of cowardice are speeches of the good of people that we say not in their hearing but in their absence.
Eulogies of cowardice is when a person who never bought you a shirt in life, buys your funeral suit. Bold cowardice is when Christians at your church spend two nights singing and praising God in your home while you are in a coffin and in life they have never fellowshipped at your home. Eulogies of cowardice are exhibited by your church pastor when he preaches the best sermon about you, and yet he has never mentioned you on a church pulpit.
Conclusion
I could go on and on, but at this point the words of Jesus are amplified in my ears when he said,
“But Jesus turning unto them said, Daughters of Jerusalem, weep not for me, but weep for yourselves, and for your children” (Luke 23:28).
Weeping for the dead while saying good about them or actually, the bad we failed to say to them is cowardice.
It is an embarrassment to us living today to do now what we failed to do then and assume it makes sense. Occultism is to worship the dead instead of the living. We should weep for ourselves, and our children for this failure amidst us.
I do not care about the right reasons you have for not doing the right thing, Just drop the cowardice excuses and explanations and start appreciating people now. The time is now to say and do good to your parents, don’t be a hospital hero, you can do good now and after.
Why do we consider the mistakes of people while living and when they are dead we forgive and forget and go blind on those mistakes and launch praise and worship? Why don’t we from today, know the bad, and praise the good in the living anyway? Why? The good you never told me while alive, please save yourself the embarrassment and not dance on my grave with a beautiful eulogy.
If you never praised me when I succeeded, say nothing about my failure. The bad you were never bold enough to tell me face to face shouldn’t be shared in my absence. It is cowardice and we should weep for ourselves and children for sure. A dying man known as Jesus saw this and said. WEEP FOR YOURSELVES. THE DEAD MOCK US.
God bless you I invoke TRUTH, REASON and FAITH (2Tim 2:7)
Priest Isaiah White (+256-793 822833 for further inquiries)
iTiS Well of Worship Fellowship (John 4:24)
@Think & Become
iTiS Well of Worship Fellowship (John 4:24) 